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Pedobear
!]] Pedobear is a form of godless bears, except that in addition to being a godless killing machine, they are godless pedophiles. It is a famous Japanese meme and is known in Japan as "Kuma" (meaning "Bear"). He also had a cameo role in I. Lewis 'Scooter' Libby's novel, The Apprentice, which just so happens to take Pedobear's home country. Parent Beware Parents beware! Pedobear has become a mascot for online pedophiles, specifically targeting innocent prepubescent girls. (Just google "pedobear" to find all those ungodly sites for lovers of immoral bears.) : Ties To The Greater Bear Family Pedobear possesses a cute teddy bear appearance. The exact relationships between Pedobear and teddy bear is unknown but experts believed that teddy bears are used to desensitized innocent prepubescent girls. Experts believed that once innocent prepubescent girls are used to hugging, snuggling, and kissing teddy bears, the girls will be open to being hugged and kissed by Pedobear. Elite Lolidefense Force To combat the ungodly scourge that is the Pedobear, the brave and noble lolis of the world gathered forth to form the Elite Lolidefense Force (ELF) to protect their sisterhood. ELF consists of the best skilled and the most combat hardened lolis ranging from mecha pilots to magical girls to kunoichi. ELF has launched a world-wide bear-hunt and will track down the very sick bear to bring it to justice. Honorary ELFs Too Old; Do Not Want! The catch phrase of Pedobear is "Too Old; Do Not Want!", which he used to describe every girl who is not a loli. Meeting Chris Hansen Chris Hansen trapped Pedobear once, but Pedobear escaped by pretended to commit suicide in front of the camera. Friends of Pedobear *Donald Duck of Disney *Warren Jeffs, King of Polygamists *OVER 9000 Catholic Priests *Mark Foley *The Republican Party The Democratic Party The Pedobear Test It is strange, but Wikiality.com has learned that the majority of people dont know if they are a pedophile Pedobear's friend or not. We suspect many gays and liburals are friends of Pedobear, and there is no way that Real Americans would mingle with such a sexual deviant... But to test our theory we are providing you with a simple test to determine who is a friend of Pedobear and who is not... LOOK AT THE PICTURE! If you are a friend of Pedobear, please contact your local police department so you can be added to the Sexual Predator list sent to a paradise island filled with lolies! Pedobear Runs for President in 2008 ("A free loli in every home" ~ Pedobear's campaign slogan) The Pedobear-Loli War of 1947 After the outbreak of WWII, there was a secret war taking place behind the scenes. The Pedo-loli War of 1947 was one of those secret wars. The Lolis around the world were tired of being chased by Pedobear and friends, so the lolies around the world formed a great world alliance known as ELF and its charter was the total annihilation of Pedobear and friends, but what they didnt count was that Pedobear had a lot of friends... a lot of them. But Lolies made a large number of the population and they launched a secret attack on "Pantsu Island" (formerly known as Loli Island), it was called "Operation Rorikon". It was the start of another World War... At first the Nations of the world didnt want to help, they were pretty much tired after WWII but when they learned that Pedobear was on the loose and it threatened the World's supplies of lolies they realized they couldn't let that perverted Bear to get away with it. Lolies were and still are a National Treasure! So they gave ELF unlimited funds and resources to stop Pedobear at all cost! America, Germany, Britain, Canada, Italy, and other Nations lent their troops and weaponry for the good of Lolikind. The ELFs gathered the armies of the world and they were able to command a large force of troops, tanks, airplanes and other military weaponry for "Operation Rorikon". They knew that the battle for "Pantsu Island" would be extremely difficult and dangerous. ELF knew that Pedobear and friends had large resources and access to illegal funds for their devious operation to take over the lolies of the world. ELF could not let that to happen! Nor did the other Nations of the world wanted to allow their most treasured resources, the lolies, be stolen from them. "Pantsu Island Falls" In 1951 Pedobear and friends lost too many troops and they realized that they would never survive another attack from ELF. They beg Pedobear to surrender but he refused, he was already gone mad and in denial with the situation. Many of Pedobear's troops decided to take their lives, while other preferred to surrendered to their enemies. But Pedobear was insisting that the war could be won soon. He locked himself in a bunker and in his delusions of madness developed grandiose plans with "imaginary troops" defending his homeland, even though he had already lost 1/3 of his Pedo-army to the ELF forces. ELF's Secret Weapon: The Mio Moe Beam See also *Bears *Bearism *Masturbating Bear *Bipolar Bear *Panda Bear *Polar bears Pedobear Seal of Approval Tubes *Pedobear's Homepage * Pedobear strikes Capitol Hill! * Undercover Loli gets exposed *Pedobear Pics * The rarest of lolies... she is also a lesbian! * New Pedobear University opens door * ELF is now recruiting infants on "The War on Pedobear" * Hawt babysitter has sex with little boy. Pedobear approved! *Pedobear opens Loli strip club! *Pedobear discovers Liberian Paradise: Promises to Raep as many lolis as he can *Real American Hero Pat Buchanan discovers Obama's terrible secret: Obama is BFF with Pedobear!! *Pedobear goes into the Ice Cream business *ELF agent turns traitor *Pedobear goes free! *Pedobear uses the "Cat Did It" defense *Pedobear Captures Loli Agent *Pedobear sells new clothes *Pedobear to be ordained as Minister *Pedobear's wife arrested! *Pedobear to move to Yemen *Pedobear house arrested *Pedobear unholy alliance with Shotacat *Pedobot invades Japan! *Pedokoala to go to prison *Pedolympics to be held in Canada *Pedobear wins card game *Pedobear to move to PA *Poland to hunt down Pedobear *iPedobear goes on sale *Wal-Mart captures Pedobear and friends! *Pedobear to become Pope *Pedobear opens new museum *Pedobear seeks Papacy *Pedobear's cousin is french and likes little boys *some guy talking about Roman Polanski Pedobear *Pedobear arrested for making coffee *Pedobear opens nursery *Pedobear found in Germany *Pedobear to open coffee shop *anti-loli agent joins pedobear *Pedobear moves to Texas *Pedobear's wife arrested *Pedobear joins police force to stop other pedobears from stealing his kiddies *Pedobear finally arrested *Pedobear 2.0 hits series of tubes *Pedobear to adopt child *Pedobear to divorce child bride *India welcomes Pedobear *Pedobear's wife goes missing *Pedobear's weird cousin goes to jail *Pedobear moves from Japan to South Korea *Pedobear looses wife! *Pedobear's nursery to close *Police continues to hunt down Pedobear *Pedobear set free. Undesirables arrested *Man declares that pedobear framed him *Pedobear approves "World of Warcraft" *Pedobear to become head of TSA. New Body Scanners to be installed on Kindergartens *Pedobear's Mother goes to jail! *Pedobear to introduce new Olympic game for 2010: The Loli Run!